For the second time in my 10+ years of interpreting, I was honor bound to voice the F-bomb from ASL into English during a class today. Because of the particular sign the student chose, there was no way of "softening" it; and because the student was so incredibly deliberate, no way around voicing it. I really don't swear that often, so to me this is an event of note.
I have long gotten over any moral quandary that I am responsible for the words coming out of my mouth when interpreting the ideas of my clients, including the young ones. It's not my identity, it's someone else's being communicated through me. I think the words we use are given meaning by the intent of the speaker, the intent of the listener(s), and the context in which it is being communicated. As an interpreter, I'm a part of the context, but not one of the main players. Still, when working with someone that is consistently pushing boundaries and being rude to teachers, staff, and myself, it just leaves me with this rather horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and ache at the base of my cranium. I'm just not wired to be rude and move on without thinking about the consequences. And, when taking on the vocal affect and verbal expressions of rudeness for hours each day, I'm exhausted. In actuality, this is a situation when free-lancing where I would simply put their name on the black-list...the list of people with whom I would refuse interpreting gigs. But this situation is different.
I know that this student has a hard life, although I don't know just how hard. And that this student has had a hard year, although not sure how hard. They need to be loved because of their insurpassable worth. So I pray that when my amount of love runs out for this particular student (usually about half-way through 3rd period), God's will just flow through me like a rushing river and leave a little extra refreshment on the way through.
What I hate most about the interpreting role is feeling powerless to do much of anything since I'm just the communication messenger. I love to advocate, to teach, to be part of effecting change. During the interpreting process, those roles feel practically non-existent. I don't deny the importance of the interpreter role; I'm just being reminded that this particular work is not what makes my heart sing.
I have long gotten over any moral quandary that I am responsible for the words coming out of my mouth when interpreting the ideas of my clients, including the young ones. It's not my identity, it's someone else's being communicated through me. I think the words we use are given meaning by the intent of the speaker, the intent of the listener(s), and the context in which it is being communicated. As an interpreter, I'm a part of the context, but not one of the main players. Still, when working with someone that is consistently pushing boundaries and being rude to teachers, staff, and myself, it just leaves me with this rather horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and ache at the base of my cranium. I'm just not wired to be rude and move on without thinking about the consequences. And, when taking on the vocal affect and verbal expressions of rudeness for hours each day, I'm exhausted. In actuality, this is a situation when free-lancing where I would simply put their name on the black-list...the list of people with whom I would refuse interpreting gigs. But this situation is different.
I know that this student has a hard life, although I don't know just how hard. And that this student has had a hard year, although not sure how hard. They need to be loved because of their insurpassable worth. So I pray that when my amount of love runs out for this particular student (usually about half-way through 3rd period), God's will just flow through me like a rushing river and leave a little extra refreshment on the way through.
What I hate most about the interpreting role is feeling powerless to do much of anything since I'm just the communication messenger. I love to advocate, to teach, to be part of effecting change. During the interpreting process, those roles feel practically non-existent. I don't deny the importance of the interpreter role; I'm just being reminded that this particular work is not what makes my heart sing.
Praying for you...for the remainder of the days past 3rd period. I can definitely see how you would feel powerless being saddled with just the "messenger" role and no other avenue to set your gifts free.
ReplyDeleteI'd never thought of this aspect of being an interpreter. Do you ever talk with the person you are interpreting for about your role as their mouthpiece? It is quite the complex relationship, but what an opportunity for incarnation! I hope you guys are settling into life well up there.
ReplyDelete